John, Nathan, Audrey and I had the pleasure of attending my grandson's final day at summer camp last Friday-- a week long adventure at Bennett's Water Ski Camp in Zachary. Kids from all over the world attend this camp, to the tune of $775 for a week, plus lodging. The staff comes from all over the world as well, usually attending ULL (University of Louisiana Lafayette), which has a world renouned water ski program. We met staff and students from Columbia, South America, Australia, Mexico, and other far-off places.
Here's a 360 video of the campus. Pretty impressive. More pix on their website.
We also took videos of my grandson doing his final "beginner ski" run in Lake #3 -- my son rode in the boat with my iPhone, and I videoed from the shore with my Sony 3.3 megapixel HDD Handycam. For some reason, Jonathan got quite a few more passes around the lake than the other students -- perhaps because he is athletic and strong and could take the beating.
I also think it's because he's a good student -- he doesn't get rattled when he makes a mistake, just gets back up and keeps going. He seems to understand that there is "a learning curve", that it takes lots of practice to get good at anything.
After his turn, we visited the Pro Shop to get a cold beverage. The shop was small but packed from floor to ceiling with water ski paraphranalia from vests, caps, bathing suits, wet suits, underwater cameras, ropes, goggles, and, of course, rows and rows of skis. I was shocked at the prices! The skis I liked were $1500, and a used water board propped up in the corner with a "For Sale" sign on it read $500. Everything costs a fortune.
Each lake had a ski boat on it towing students one after another. Our boat was the smallest, a MasterCraft, which we were told cost $65,000. No telling how much gas it burns in a day. There is nothing cheap about water skiing!
And that's just to pleasure ski. Competition water skiing, getting to the venues, lodgings, etc., must be very expensive as well.
Made me appreciate that agility is a relatively inexpensive sport -- an agility Pro Shop unnecessary. Most of the equipment is stuff we'd use to care for the family dog -- a crate or two, leashes, dog beds and cushions, treats, dog food and bowls. Add a few camp chairs, an exercise pen, a rug, a cooler, a battery powered fan. No fancy attire required - your everyday shorts, tennies, jeans and T's. A sweat band or two. A few jumps in the back yard, and a place to practice that has all the "expensive" equipment. Or, like me, you could have your own fully equipped agility yard for under $1000 iif you build your own.
Of course, our most essential piece of "equipment" is the dog! And that, we'd probably have anyway.
Upwards and onward!
Michele
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Conformation Class with Pepper
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| Min-E-Me wins Reserve Winner's Bitch, 6-9 month puppy class, on June 16, 2012 |
We were the only team that showed up for Netta's class so we got a private lesson. There's more to this conformation stuff than meets the eye.
- Walking a puppy on leash with their head held high and a few feet out from the handler, not sniffing the ground, wabbling too and fro, or looking all around,
- keeping a steady trot that shows off the dog's structure, in a circle and also in a straight line,
- dog standing frontways to the judge,
- having an "interesting expression on command",
- stacking on the table,
- standing for exam,
- not minding having their teeth and body examined by a total stranger,
- having the dog interested in the bait, but not lunging for it.
I also got a few important pointers on how to behave at a show:
- Get to the ring early and watch how the previous dogs are asked to move around the ring by your judge. Then when it's your turn you can concentrate more on your dog than ciphering the judge's instructions.
- Make sure the dog is freshly washed and well groomed.
- Handlers are often seen holding the dog's tail in the UP position BECAUSE even breeds who usually carry their tails UP will tend to drop their tails when approached by a stranger or even just ill at ease at a show.
- Get the recommended thinnest possible white show leash for Pepper, so it won't show up in his white neck hair.
Pepper was feisty, as usual, concerned almost entirely with smelling, exploring the parking lot, and getting his chicken gizzard treats. In other words -- all over the place and pulling hard on his leash. Netta remarked she wished she had a video camera to film her pupils so we could see our gait, I whipped my brand new 4GS iPhone out from my pocket, and she took my first video on that phone. Learning to point and shoot with an iPhone takes some getting used to, and all but one position requires rotating in Windows Live Movie Maker, but here's the little snippet she got.
Being as Pepper is trained to sit when I quit walking, I was pleased how quickly he caught on to remain standing, though I couldn't get him to face the judge rather than me.
When I got home, all the dogs were psyched. They don't like being left behind while I take Pepper places. Pepper and Lucky began a friendly tug of war, with Maxie watching on. This went on about 5 minutes before I decided to video that, too. John held the camera. We are always amazed at the way Lucky regulates her tugging to suit her playmate (she's very strong and can tug your arm off, shake you up and drag you across the room), and the way she handed the toy off to Pepper time after time. It was in a darkened living room, so we got to test the flash feature on the new iPhone. It lit the room moderately well but made the dogs' eyes look like Tasmanian Devils. Even so, the video is an interesting study of cooperative dog behavior (sharing a toy), and self-regulating behavior, so I'm sharing it below.
Upwards and onward,
Friday, June 15, 2012
Cushings Disease and Fooh Fooh
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| FoohFooh and Maxie |
His presenting symptoms have been excessive water consumption, excessive urination (including indoors), excessive begging, ravanous appetite, weight loss, dull hair, lethargy, loss of muscle tone, irritability, food guarding, eating whole toilet paper rolls, plastic bags, paper towels, mail, raiding trash cans, and growling if you try to take them away, lying in the doorways and halls then snapping at us if we try to step over or move him (why he bit me), not coming when called, reluctance to go outside.
As soon as I told the vet, she said it was almost certainly Cushings Disease, a brain tumor on the pituitary gland that causes symptoms easily confused with "old age", but treatable, and a relief to know it is not painful to the dog.
She spent a lot of time listening to his heart. Feces and blood work came back "normal", no diabetes, but there was blood in the urine-- a unirary tract infection. She put him on Keflex for 2 weeks. After that he goes back for a second evaluation and to establish a course of treatment for Cushings.
The vet said "Look Cushings up on the internet. There is a lot to learn." That was a first -- a medical professional advising me to research a condition myself! So this morning I Googled "Cushings Disease Dogs" and found that it is a disease of the endocrine system (see diagram). Here are the most suscinct summaries I pieced together from here and there.
Symptoms: Symptoms of Cushing's disease can be vague and varied and tend to appear gradually and progressively. It is thus easy to mistake Cushing's disease for normal aging. Additionally, many of the clinical symptoms are not unique to Cushing's and could reflect a number of other health concerns.
The most common symptoms include:
• increased/excessive water consumption (polydipsia)
• increased/excessive urination (polyuria)
• urinary accidents in previously housetrained dogs
• increased/excessive appetite (polyphagia)
• appearance of food stealing/guarding, begging, trash dumping, etc.
• sagging, bloated, pot-bellied appearance
• weight gain or its appearance, due to fat redistribution
• loss of muscle mass, giving the appearance of weight loss
• bony, skull-like appearance of head
• exercise intolerance, lethargy, general or hind-leg weakness
• new reluctance to jump on furniture or people
• excess panting, seeking cool surfaces to rest on
• symmetrically thinning hair or baldness (alopecia) on torso
• other coat changes like dullness, dryness
• slow regrowth of hair after clipping
• thin, wrinkled, fragile, and/or darkly pigmented skin
• easily damaged/bruised skin that heals slowly
• hard, calcified lumps in the skin (calcinosis cutis)
• susceptibility to infections (especially skin and urinary)
• diabetes, pancreatitis, seizures
There are several types of Cushings, and different treatment for each one, but they all affect the pituitary and adrenal glands. Here's a summary of that:
In health: In order to understand Cushing's disease, one needs to understand the basics of the negative feedback loop that operates in a normal, healthy dog. The pituitary gland, located at the base of the brain, produces ACTH (adrenocorticotrophic hormone), as directed by the hypothalamus (another part of the brain). This hormone is released into the bloodstream and stimulates the body's two adrenal glands, located near the kidneys, to secrete glucocorticoid (cortisone-like or cortisol) hormones into the bloodstream. Cortisol helps the body respond to stress. It is necessary for life and impacts a wide variety of bodily functions including blood sugar levels, fat metabolism, skeletal muscles, kidney function, nervous system, cardiovascular system, and immune response. ACTH/cortisol secretion is increased due to stress, including infection, pain, surgery, trauma, cold temperatures. When the blood cortisol levels are high enough, the pituitary stops secreting ACTH. When the blood cortisol levels dip low enough, the pituitary secretes more ACTH. The adrenals respond by secreting glucocorticoid hormones in response to the pituitary, just as the pituitary responds by secreting ACTH in response to the adrenals. The net effect is that a mildly fluctuating balance is achieved. This is an oversimplified picture of cortisol homeostasis in the healthy dog.
In Cushing's Disease: The feedback loop has gone awry for one of three reasons: a pituitary tumor, an adrenal tumor, or veterinary interference. The result is a chronic excess of blood cortisol. In effect, the dog is being poisoned with too much cortisol and cannot rely on its own feedback mechanism to regulate the blood cortisol level.
Cortisol increases appetite and thirst, so owners may notice that they are filling their dog’s food and water bowls much more often than usual, and in fact may report that their pet’s appetite is ravenous. Likewise, they often report abnormal hair loss that is symmetrical on both sides of their dog’s body, along with loss of muscle mass especially in the legs. Muscle atrophy and corresponding redistribution of weight often give dogs with this disease a “pot-bellied” look. They also commonly have poor wound healing. Dogs with hyperadrenocorticism are predisposed to developing other problems, including heart failure, diabetes mellitus, infections and high blood pressure. Typically, several of these signs appear at or around the same time. As the disease progresses, affected dogs’ signs typically worsen and increase in number. However, because Cushing’s is largely treatable, possibly curable and usually manageable, it is important for dog owners to become familiar with the signs of this disease.
Prevention: Unfortunately, other than managing the medical use of corticosteroids, there is no way to prevent hyperadrenocorticism in dogs. Functional tumors of the pituitary and/or adrenal glands occur for unknown reasons, and until the cause of those tumors is discovered, prevention of Cushing’s disease is not realistic.
Bottom line: Cushing's disease is a common condition in older dogs and is often mistaken for signs of normal aging. Although most dogs with Cushing's disease cannot be cured, their quality of life (as well as the owner's quality of life) can be improved, and their lives may be extended with early intervention. It is often possible to successfully manage this disease for years. It thus behooves the pet owner to become familiar with the typical signs of Cushing's and the treatments available.
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| Fooh Fooh blocks the gate and won't move. |
So, it looks like I'm on another voyage of discovery. SIGH! I always question the concept that there is no cure for things, and will commence exploring whether there are homeopathic remedies. There are so many other things I'd prefer to be doing but it's hard to ignore a 40 lb. dog that growls and snaps and limits my freedom of movement in my own home. And I love my FoohFooh, though I must admit, my fond feelings for him diminish in proportion to his increased and unpredictable aggressiveness, as well as ruined carpets. If anyone out there has experience with this disease, or with these feelings, please offer me your advice.Upwards and onward, I guess . . . . .
Friday, June 8, 2012
Blog Action Day Takeaways - "Attitude"
Having read all 54 posts sent in by agility bloggers on June 6th on the subject of "Attitude", the main point made seems to be that everyone struggles with developing and maintaining a good attitude, most people have had experiences with rude competitors at trials, and most people approach agility as "fun". Here are my favorite takeaways and links to some full articles. A list of all the articles can be found here.
“Attitude controls Altitude.” ~unknown
"If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it”. ~Mary Engelbreit
"Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right." ~Henry Ford
"There are exactly as many special occasions in life as we choose to celebrate." ~Robert Brault
"Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment." ~Oprah Winfrey
http://www.flyingpoodles.com/2012/06/06/attitude/
I don’t think a one-size-fits-all approach to dog training works. Dogs, like people, bring different personalities to training. One dog can be resilient, another slower to bounce back.
I have been taking a Control Unleashed course from Greta Kaplan, with Dancer. It has taught me a lot about reading the very subtle signals. . . . .
http://jility.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/dont-you-know-who-i-am/
There are plenty of attitudes in agility; some good – some not so much. For some reason, there are people in this sport who . . . . . think that being able to get a dog around an agility course successfully, gives them permission to treat those they perceive as less worthy, poorly.
I love it when something goes wrong in a run, but the handler smiles and never blames their dog. When the run ends, they smile at their dog and their dog smiles back, never knowing anything went wrong. Now THAT is a great attitude!
http://www.reddogsrule.net/2012/06/agility-blog-action-day-attitude.html
Your ability to be persuaded to change your attitude is directly linked to your intelligence - low intelligence and high intelligence are struggle to change; whereas, average intelligence are more able to be persuaded one way or the other. Same goes for self-esteem. Those with super high self esteem or low self esteem find it more difficult to move the needle on their attitude; whereas, those with average self-esteem are more open.
http://blog.teamsmalldog.com/2012/06/thing-about-attitudes.html
Life is too short to be an asshole or to let one under your skin.
http://allstaragility.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/attitude-handling-with-emotion-cues/
While we put a lot of emphasis on how dogs read our motion cues (forward, deceleration, lateral, etc), something I believe comes in a very close second is our body cues and specifically, emotion cues.
http://agilitynerd.com/blog/agility/handling/HandlingWithIntensity.html
For me the most important aspect of handling, next to using Proactive Handling, is bringing an intensity to my execution.
When it is time to run the course I try to push everything else out of mind and have a narrow focus on executing, closely watching/cuing my dog and really driving myself to those points where I need to be. Handling still must balance where you need to be with providing the cues your dog needs when they need them. But as soon as my dog knows what is needed; I try to be unrelentingly driving forward to my next spot.
http://2mindogtrainer.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/2-minute-dog-trainer-tunnel-vision-and-attitude/
A positive attitude isn’t something that comes naturally to all of us.
But I have practiced the journey to that happy place often enough that I can easily find my way. I just have to want to make it so, and I do.
http://budhouston.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/passage/
It’s hard to make a case for being passionate about not giving a damn (it’s only a game) without it sounding slightly discordant. That being said, I’m a student of the game, and a coach in the game. But on a very personal level, it’s just a game I play with my dogs.
http://www.poodlesinmotion.com/2012/06/06/i-want-to-be-like-my-dog-when-i-grow-up/
Lots of poetic affirmations on this post, such as:
When I’m 74 years old, I will wake up each morning with an attitude that says, “more please”. I will lift my body from the sheets, display a few downward facing dog yoga poses to alert my joints and muscles that the day has begun and shake my body with a vigor that leaves my checks nicely smoothed out from the creases left by pillow. I will venture forward to void yesterday and make room for today’s surprises.
http://viewfr4inch.blogspot.com/2012/06/chair-in-middle-of-room-attitude-of.html
As Samurai took a U-turn to check out the trash . . . . . Daisy Peel (my trainer) calmly said,"No, just wait for him. Sometimes when I do this, I just pull a chair to the middle of the ring." And as she said it, she pulled two chairs into the ring. And sat. After awhile, Samurai, apparently bored of his explorations, came flying back, taking a jump for kicks. . . . Daisy clicked it. His curiosity piqued. He circled and ran toward us. Clicked again. Sam sensed it and began to offer more behaviors. Soon he was acting as if he must surely be the smartest and most charming Papillon in the world.
We must honor, respect and find joy in a dog's endless ability to be uniquely and utterly itself . . . . . To realize, allow and accept this fact in total is to open a font of positive energy that can be channeled to many things. It surpasses control because it is a response that is freely given and grown in an attitude of openness.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Plenty more worth reading and remembering, but these are the ones that struck me the most.
Upwards and onward,
“Attitude controls Altitude.” ~unknown
"If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it”. ~Mary Engelbreit
"Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right." ~Henry Ford
"There are exactly as many special occasions in life as we choose to celebrate." ~Robert Brault
"Doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment." ~Oprah Winfrey
http://www.flyingpoodles.com/2012/06/06/attitude/
I don’t think a one-size-fits-all approach to dog training works. Dogs, like people, bring different personalities to training. One dog can be resilient, another slower to bounce back.
I have been taking a Control Unleashed course from Greta Kaplan, with Dancer. It has taught me a lot about reading the very subtle signals. . . . .
http://jility.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/dont-you-know-who-i-am/
There are plenty of attitudes in agility; some good – some not so much. For some reason, there are people in this sport who . . . . . think that being able to get a dog around an agility course successfully, gives them permission to treat those they perceive as less worthy, poorly.
I love it when something goes wrong in a run, but the handler smiles and never blames their dog. When the run ends, they smile at their dog and their dog smiles back, never knowing anything went wrong. Now THAT is a great attitude!
http://www.reddogsrule.net/2012/06/agility-blog-action-day-attitude.html
Your ability to be persuaded to change your attitude is directly linked to your intelligence - low intelligence and high intelligence are struggle to change; whereas, average intelligence are more able to be persuaded one way or the other. Same goes for self-esteem. Those with super high self esteem or low self esteem find it more difficult to move the needle on their attitude; whereas, those with average self-esteem are more open.
http://blog.teamsmalldog.com/2012/06/thing-about-attitudes.html
Life is too short to be an asshole or to let one under your skin.
http://allstaragility.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/attitude-handling-with-emotion-cues/
While we put a lot of emphasis on how dogs read our motion cues (forward, deceleration, lateral, etc), something I believe comes in a very close second is our body cues and specifically, emotion cues.
http://agilitynerd.com/blog/agility/handling/HandlingWithIntensity.html
For me the most important aspect of handling, next to using Proactive Handling, is bringing an intensity to my execution.
When it is time to run the course I try to push everything else out of mind and have a narrow focus on executing, closely watching/cuing my dog and really driving myself to those points where I need to be. Handling still must balance where you need to be with providing the cues your dog needs when they need them. But as soon as my dog knows what is needed; I try to be unrelentingly driving forward to my next spot.
http://2mindogtrainer.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/2-minute-dog-trainer-tunnel-vision-and-attitude/
A positive attitude isn’t something that comes naturally to all of us.
But I have practiced the journey to that happy place often enough that I can easily find my way. I just have to want to make it so, and I do.
http://budhouston.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/passage/
It’s hard to make a case for being passionate about not giving a damn (it’s only a game) without it sounding slightly discordant. That being said, I’m a student of the game, and a coach in the game. But on a very personal level, it’s just a game I play with my dogs.
http://www.poodlesinmotion.com/2012/06/06/i-want-to-be-like-my-dog-when-i-grow-up/
Lots of poetic affirmations on this post, such as:
When I’m 74 years old, I will wake up each morning with an attitude that says, “more please”. I will lift my body from the sheets, display a few downward facing dog yoga poses to alert my joints and muscles that the day has begun and shake my body with a vigor that leaves my checks nicely smoothed out from the creases left by pillow. I will venture forward to void yesterday and make room for today’s surprises.
http://viewfr4inch.blogspot.com/2012/06/chair-in-middle-of-room-attitude-of.html
As Samurai took a U-turn to check out the trash . . . . . Daisy Peel (my trainer) calmly said,"No, just wait for him. Sometimes when I do this, I just pull a chair to the middle of the ring." And as she said it, she pulled two chairs into the ring. And sat. After awhile, Samurai, apparently bored of his explorations, came flying back, taking a jump for kicks. . . . Daisy clicked it. His curiosity piqued. He circled and ran toward us. Clicked again. Sam sensed it and began to offer more behaviors. Soon he was acting as if he must surely be the smartest and most charming Papillon in the world.
We must honor, respect and find joy in a dog's endless ability to be uniquely and utterly itself . . . . . To realize, allow and accept this fact in total is to open a font of positive energy that can be channeled to many things. It surpasses control because it is a response that is freely given and grown in an attitude of openness.
/////////////////////////////////////////////////////
Plenty more worth reading and remembering, but these are the ones that struck me the most.
Upwards and onward,
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Blog Action Day - "Attitude"
This post is part of a quarterly Blog Action Day initiative started by Steve Schwarz. You can read other agility bloggers' posts on "Attitude" here.
A large majority of agility enthusiasts express the same positive attitude that "as long as you are having fun, you're doing good." It's so obvious, they never question it. And I totally agree -- NOW. But it hasn't always been so. So I thought I'd share the bad attitude I had to overcome to get to the "fun" part.
Long before I could begin to grapple with a good attitude towards agility training, I had to overcome my father's strong opinion that pleasurable pursuits are frivolous. A product of the Great Depression and WWII, he was so afraid his children might starve, I suppose, that all he approved of was educational excellence and good jobs. Our focus must first be on self-sufficiency, and then on improving society. Perhaps without quite meaning to, he convinced his children that hobbies are superfluous. Even though he played golf avidly, he always told us it was "strictly for business".
He thought that doing things for "personal relevance" is pure self indulgence (biblically, a waste of one's talents), and the fastest road to hell. He was not an appreciater of art or literature, either, unless it was the classics. I can still hear him say, "if you can't paint like Michaelangelo, don't waste the canvas. If you can't write like Shakespeare, don't clutter the world with your drivel. If you're not prima ballerina material, I won't throw away money on ballet lessons." Extrapolating from that, he might say "If you can't be Susan Garrett, don't train dogs". Of agility, he once asked "are you making money at it yet". That was his criteria. Never, ever, "are you having fun".
I bet most of the rest of you didn't have this impediment to overcome!
I've had to learn to pursue my hobbies guilt free. Getting rid of his parental influence in this area has been a life's work, and from my success at it, I can attest that:
I was well into adulthood, almost 40 in fact, before realizing that Dad's opinions weren't binding on me, that hobbies are healthy, that progressive learning is unavoidable, that skill-building takes time, that there is plenty of room for people in the middle. We can't all be super-stars. I learned to take responsibility for my own personal happiness, to value myself as worthy of such happiness, and to reach for and be content with "my own personal best". Not to compare myself to the brightest stars in the sky, but just shine as brightly as I can. To take pride in my progress. But it took me many years to quit carrying around that big bag of guilt for doing things I naturally love to do, even if they don't make money or win me high recognition. I've had to learn to take care of my own inner child, to be my own parent, to praise and encourage myself the way I see other parents praising their kids (and dogs) for every little thing they do. My blog helps me do that. Every now and then I notice another "guilt" boulder I'm carrying around, and heave it. Yeah!
I expressed my hard won mindset in a poem to my son in 1990, as I struggled to learn to live a joyful life, free from unnecessary struggles and needless grief! It's called "Mamma's Last Request", and imagines the final piece of advice I would give to anyone about "attitude".
With that mountain mostly climbed, it frees me to work towards a winning attitude in agility. Of course, more mountains to overcome there. I'm absolutely no athelete. I've had to learn and relearn to get up early (I'm a total night person). I've had to spend money on coaching, developing a precompetition routine, a thicker skin, and get comfortable with the fact that I'll never be a Susan Garrett. Setting realistic personal goals, not comparing myself to others, are all important tools in my "agility attitude" tool kit.
Perhaps I'm not over the guilt yet because I'm still motivated to justify my hobbies. But here's my spin on having 5 dogs and spending so much time and money on training them. First and foremost, my dogs are heap good therapy. They pay their way 100 times over. They add structure to my retirement. I wake up every morning full of motivation (a priceless treasure), and agility is simultaneously my social life, my physical therapy and my antecdote to alzheimers! No telling how much money I save not needing a psychotherapist or anti-depressants to get through life's confusing, sometimes discouraging, jungle. Far from being "superfluous" or even "optional", I consider my dogs and their training essential to me living "the good life".
My dogs, unlike any humans I know, inspire me to stretch beyond my current abilities, then pay me back immediately with acceptance, affection and devotion. They exude confidence in themselves and in me, thus are ideal companions! They keep me laughing -- heap good medicine! It's exhilerating to love and be loved so intensely. Maxie, Willow and Lucky Lucy are my therapy, and now Pepper, so full of cocky Papillon attitude and enthusiasm, with his future all ahead of him and totally trusting that I keep him safe and teach him all I can, is another motivator.
Expressions of gratitude for all my blessings, effusively and frequently offered throughout my blog and elsewhere, keeps me rich and mostly upbeat, too! Money can't buy that. My cup overfloweth, and I know it. Hopefully I carry that into the arena.
My dogs are what is motivating me now to heal my aching hip, fix my cataract surgery gone wrong, both of which have about stopped me in my agility tracks, so I can get back to training and trialing with them -- perfecting those well-timed front crosses, serpentines, running contacts, and reliable start-line stays, and giving everything all the intensity I've got.
Thanks for letting me share,
A large majority of agility enthusiasts express the same positive attitude that "as long as you are having fun, you're doing good." It's so obvious, they never question it. And I totally agree -- NOW. But it hasn't always been so. So I thought I'd share the bad attitude I had to overcome to get to the "fun" part.
Long before I could begin to grapple with a good attitude towards agility training, I had to overcome my father's strong opinion that pleasurable pursuits are frivolous. A product of the Great Depression and WWII, he was so afraid his children might starve, I suppose, that all he approved of was educational excellence and good jobs. Our focus must first be on self-sufficiency, and then on improving society. Perhaps without quite meaning to, he convinced his children that hobbies are superfluous. Even though he played golf avidly, he always told us it was "strictly for business".
He thought that doing things for "personal relevance" is pure self indulgence (biblically, a waste of one's talents), and the fastest road to hell. He was not an appreciater of art or literature, either, unless it was the classics. I can still hear him say, "if you can't paint like Michaelangelo, don't waste the canvas. If you can't write like Shakespeare, don't clutter the world with your drivel. If you're not prima ballerina material, I won't throw away money on ballet lessons." Extrapolating from that, he might say "If you can't be Susan Garrett, don't train dogs". Of agility, he once asked "are you making money at it yet". That was his criteria. Never, ever, "are you having fun".
I bet most of the rest of you didn't have this impediment to overcome!
I've had to learn to pursue my hobbies guilt free. Getting rid of his parental influence in this area has been a life's work, and from my success at it, I can attest that:
- If you let other people's opinions shape you, you can not live your own life.
- If you dwell in the past, you're future becomes so weighted down with old issues it can't take flight.
- If you set your sights too high, you may never start your journey.
- If you don't cultivate gratitude for the many good things around you, the negatives can swamp you.
I expressed my hard won mindset in a poem to my son in 1990, as I struggled to learn to live a joyful life, free from unnecessary struggles and needless grief! It's called "Mamma's Last Request", and imagines the final piece of advice I would give to anyone about "attitude".
Counting my blessings is another big tool. It's the tool kit itself. This often takes the form of putting positive spin on what seems like a constant stream of negatives. Here's a poster I used to keep on my wall which, to me, exemplifies the "spin" trick.
The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.
While to others I may seem more confused than ever,
and to myself as well,
and to myself as well,
I believe I am confused on a higher level
and about more important things.
 |
| Pepper guarding his rock, age 7 months. |
Thanks for letting me share,
Friday, May 25, 2012
RV Improvements and Observations
Here's the floorplan of my new RV, a 1999 Four Winds 5000, 28A, which hasn't changed much in 13 years. Even without slideouts, it's roomy and feels spacious:
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There is so much I like about this unit. For one, the layout is attractive, and convenient in every way -- very well thought out. The woodwork is beautiful. The cabinets close securely. The color scheme throughout is attractive, with nappy gray/brown fabric on the couches and seats that will wear well and won't show dirt. I like that it's carpeted, and the carpet is clean. The couches are comfortable. The couch bed flips open with one flick of the wrist, and there's still room to walk around.
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I love my kitchen, complete with vented stove, oven, microwave, double sink, and window blinds, and there is plenty of storage. Both the hot water heater and refrigerator operate on both AC and LP gas, and the fridge gets plenty cold. And it's plenty roomy.
The windows have screens which are all in perfect shape, and they all have these very cool pleated fabric blinds that pull up and down, one for shade, the other for privacy.
The bedroom delights me so much, I've taken several naps out there. Not much walking space, but the queen mattress is 7" of memory foam, extremely comfortable. I need a soft bed. There's plenty of storage in that room, and a form fitting bedspread and throw pillow, in colors that won't show dirt! My dogs have already claimed this space! They know it's all for them.
There's a side table by the bed, which many RV's don't have (even the fancy ones), with convenient electric plug placement for a reading lamp and fan, and I bought myself a little radio, casette/CD player so I can listen to radio, music or Books On Tape. I keep it going even more than the TV. Very cozy. After a hard day of trialing, I'm looking forward to kicking back in my plush bed surrounded by snoring dogs, and being read to sleep. My friend Joy donated me several Books-On-Tape casettes that she buys from the Library for $1 each, then passes along to friends.
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It's hard to find things small enough to fit in tight spaces, but soon after I got home I found a little wooden medicine cabinet at Lowes, for the bathroom. It looks like a built in, a perfect color match, and was on sale for $24. I installed it immediately. It's a bit tricky finding wooden beams behind the thin interior walls, but I did. Also installed a paper towel rack inside the door of the cabinet under the kitchen sink.
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I noticed right off that the shower takes up a lot of space, which goes un-used most of the time. So I measured the cavity and went searching for some stackable Sterlite drawers in which to store everything from dish towels to paperwork to small tools (stuff that clutters up the surfaces if there is no place to put it). I found these drawers at Wal-Mart, and they turn the space into a useful dresser/closet/counter. I can remove the drawers to the bedroom whenever I want to take a shower, then stack them back in. When travelling, I secure the drawers in place with bungie cords. Along the sides I have room to store my Hokey, broom, window sun screens, etc.
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I also purchased a one-piece unit for the outside compartment, very convenient for storing the myriad items of hardware one carries -- from small tools to bungie cords, duct tape, wasp spray and other things that would otherwise rattle around and make a mess. This unit is easily removed as well when loading and unloading the rear compartment with all the porch furniture. It fits in snuggly enough that it can't tump over, and I hope is sturdy enough that it won't break apart on the road.
All my chairs, table, coolers, barbeque pit, fans, rugs, wagon and such forth fit in the two outside compartments. The back compartment is 2' wide x 9' across, a near perfect size for the bigger stuff, but there is absolutely NO wiggle room for our 2'x4' folding table, our 2' x 4' Xpen segments, and Lucky's large crate. These RV manufacturers need to get hip to the fact that many items that need storing are exactly 2' wide. We need at least an extra 2-4 inches for clearance.
Most of the equipment I had purchased for the pop up camper (table, chairs, lamps, extension cords, clamps, pots, pans, dishes, etc.), work perfect in the RV.
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I purchased 32' (two 16' units) of 48" high xpen to make a yard for my dogs. Ebay had a great price on these. I also built 15' of plastic lattice skirting along the bottom edge of the RV, to keep the dogs from escaping under the vehicle. I was pleased to discover that the same edge pieces designed to cap off and strengthen the lattice, also slid on top of the x-pen segments to keep them more stable. X-pens segments are, I've found, pretty flimsy unless you set up an octagon. I still need to rig up, or invent, some sort of stabilizers at ground level.
Some would consider it a minus that my RV has no built in entertainment center. Instead, there is an empty overhead bed. However, for about $400, I designed my own. With luck, I scored a $200 22" flat screen 1080 HDTV from Best Buy for $119 (their last unit), and a $79 BlueRay player on sale for $49, $80 for a swivel arm wall mount, and a Surround Sound Sound Bar from Target for $79, which looks/sounds great. (The regular TV speakers could barely be heard over the full blast air conditioner.) John already had a box to convert analog antenna signals to digital, and we plan to upgrade the antenna to receive signals from over 50 miles away. Of course, we expect mostly to use TV for local news, and to play DVD's and training videos. We also investigated Direct TV for our whole house with a portable box included to take on trips, but that option collapsed when they came out and told us we have too many trees on our property to receive clear satellite signals 24/7. So we're stuck with cable. Bummer!
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John and I spent all day yesterday, tearing out false walls and bottoms in the pictured overhead cabinet, to mount the TV on a swivel arm. What a job, and we still have to hide all the wires! But it looks great and I'm satisfied with my little "entertainment center". And I still have all that overhead storage at my disposal.
I've repaired a bunch of little things too numerous to mention like a small tear in the drivers seat upholstery, a loose doorknob with stripped screws, etc, and added several little features like a 12 volt plug, an outside thermometer, a wall clock, driver and passenger window sun blockers, rugs on the steps, and so forth. I love my little engineering projects, and am pretty good at problem solving. It's heap good therapy, and I ain't finished.
When I am finished, I plan to make a list for RV developers to consider that would make their product just a wee bit better.
I'm also getting the pop-up camper ready to sell, leaving in it all the improvements I've made. I'll be real proud if someone comes along who appreciates all the work I've done on that unit, especially claiming the vertical spaces with removable shelving. To tell the truth, it's about as comfortable as the RV once it's set up. No kidding. Setting it up just takes too much time and energy when I have to run my dogs the same day.
So, I'm keeping busy. Even though my vision is skewed and my Mom's health has me worried and my hip hurts so I'm not practicing agility and have yet to sign up for my next trial, at least I'm dreaming about competing again and preparing for it in what ways I can.
Upwards and onward!
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There is so much I like about this unit. For one, the layout is attractive, and convenient in every way -- very well thought out. The woodwork is beautiful. The cabinets close securely. The color scheme throughout is attractive, with nappy gray/brown fabric on the couches and seats that will wear well and won't show dirt. I like that it's carpeted, and the carpet is clean. The couches are comfortable. The couch bed flips open with one flick of the wrist, and there's still room to walk around.
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I love my kitchen, complete with vented stove, oven, microwave, double sink, and window blinds, and there is plenty of storage. Both the hot water heater and refrigerator operate on both AC and LP gas, and the fridge gets plenty cold. And it's plenty roomy.The windows have screens which are all in perfect shape, and they all have these very cool pleated fabric blinds that pull up and down, one for shade, the other for privacy.
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| L to R, Willow, Maxie, Lucky Lucy, Pepper |
There's a side table by the bed, which many RV's don't have (even the fancy ones), with convenient electric plug placement for a reading lamp and fan, and I bought myself a little radio, casette/CD player so I can listen to radio, music or Books On Tape. I keep it going even more than the TV. Very cozy. After a hard day of trialing, I'm looking forward to kicking back in my plush bed surrounded by snoring dogs, and being read to sleep. My friend Joy donated me several Books-On-Tape casettes that she buys from the Library for $1 each, then passes along to friends..jpg)
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I noticed right off that the shower takes up a lot of space, which goes un-used most of the time. So I measured the cavity and went searching for some stackable Sterlite drawers in which to store everything from dish towels to paperwork to small tools (stuff that clutters up the surfaces if there is no place to put it). I found these drawers at Wal-Mart, and they turn the space into a useful dresser/closet/counter. I can remove the drawers to the bedroom whenever I want to take a shower, then stack them back in. When travelling, I secure the drawers in place with bungie cords. Along the sides I have room to store my Hokey, broom, window sun screens, etc..jpg)
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| You can see straight through to the other side, and the back of the Sterlite drawers from the previous photo. |
Most of the equipment I had purchased for the pop up camper (table, chairs, lamps, extension cords, clamps, pots, pans, dishes, etc.), work perfect in the RV.
.jpg)
Some would consider it a minus that my RV has no built in entertainment center. Instead, there is an empty overhead bed. However, for about $400, I designed my own. With luck, I scored a $200 22" flat screen 1080 HDTV from Best Buy for $119 (their last unit), and a $79 BlueRay player on sale for $49, $80 for a swivel arm wall mount, and a Surround Sound Sound Bar from Target for $79, which looks/sounds great. (The regular TV speakers could barely be heard over the full blast air conditioner.) John already had a box to convert analog antenna signals to digital, and we plan to upgrade the antenna to receive signals from over 50 miles away. Of course, we expect mostly to use TV for local news, and to play DVD's and training videos. We also investigated Direct TV for our whole house with a portable box included to take on trips, but that option collapsed when they came out and told us we have too many trees on our property to receive clear satellite signals 24/7. So we're stuck with cable. Bummer!
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I've repaired a bunch of little things too numerous to mention like a small tear in the drivers seat upholstery, a loose doorknob with stripped screws, etc, and added several little features like a 12 volt plug, an outside thermometer, a wall clock, driver and passenger window sun blockers, rugs on the steps, and so forth. I love my little engineering projects, and am pretty good at problem solving. It's heap good therapy, and I ain't finished.
When I am finished, I plan to make a list for RV developers to consider that would make their product just a wee bit better.
I'm also getting the pop-up camper ready to sell, leaving in it all the improvements I've made. I'll be real proud if someone comes along who appreciates all the work I've done on that unit, especially claiming the vertical spaces with removable shelving. To tell the truth, it's about as comfortable as the RV once it's set up. No kidding. Setting it up just takes too much time and energy when I have to run my dogs the same day.
So, I'm keeping busy. Even though my vision is skewed and my Mom's health has me worried and my hip hurts so I'm not practicing agility and have yet to sign up for my next trial, at least I'm dreaming about competing again and preparing for it in what ways I can.
Upwards and onward!
My New RV
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| My new RV, parked at my house |
Without slideouts, power windows or power mirrors, there is less to break. I like that.
Instead of flying home, I drove her home in 2 days. It took a bit of getting used to and there is a blind spot to be wary of, but she had absolutely no problems, drives like a dream (for a bouncy motor home), and I am thrilled. Comfortable speed 70 mph. John and friends lined the driveway, banging pots and pans with wooden spoons to welcome her home, and John cooked at lovely sesame/ginger stir fry for us all.
I've been packing her and making minor improvements every day since I got her home (more on that later). I also took her to the Tanya's agility seminar just after I brought her home, and several friends got to climb in and take a look. I was proud to show her off.
Of course, the gas mileage sucks - about 8-9 mpg. OUCH! But I've heard that if I hold my speed down to 60 mph, it will improve my gas mileage by 30-40%. In any case, I had already made up my mind that this RV isn't about saving money on lodging at agility trials or on trips. It's all about convenience, comfort and enjoyment. This is my sailboat. My sports car. My airplane. It's my luxury item.
I drove 6.5 hours the first day, pulled into the LaQuinta Inn Tallahassee where we usually stay and asked the manager if I could just park there overnight. He said sure, truckers do it all the time. So, for free, I found a safe spot right in their parking lot and hit the bed! Saved about $60 on hotel fees, which put another 15 gallons of gas in my tank, which got me another 125 miles down the road.
I got my dream RV, appropriately, from Dream RV in Bradenton, FL. They could not have been nicer about getting the unit ready for me, fixing the few cosmetic problems it had. No razzle dazzle salesmen. I feel like I've made some good friends there, and recommend them to everyone. But I would only visit in person. The prices on the website are far jacked up from what you can get in person.
I'll show more photos and give more details as time permits.
Upwards and onward,
Pepper Goes To School
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| Pepper, Pepper Tu, Pepperoni at 6 months, in his natural stack. |
Kay Watson was his teacher, there were 8 dogs in the class and we all had to promise to be organized and stay in line. It was shades of Maxie's first class 4.5 years ago, all over again. Same instructor. Same excitement. Same results -- Pepper did fabulous. 100% enthusiastic, gung ho, attentive, no fear of the other dogs though he was by far the smallest canine on the line. His "loose leash" behavior needs some work -- he's more like a "marlin on a line" keeping maximum tension on the leash and running too and fro trying to visit everybody, but that's because I haven't had him on a leash for a few months and he's never been in a class.
With my hip bothering me and unable to, or at least afraid to run, plus the other "components" I'm dealing with (cataract surgery gone awry, death in the family, mother emotionally unstable) I'm sitting out of the advanced classes with Lucky and Maxie for a few weeks more at least, but I felt I could handle an Intro class where we're just introducing one obstacle at a time, I don't have to concentrate much, and there's no running involved.
Several classmates commented that Pepper was a beautiful Papillon, in a "My, what big ears you have" sort of way. More than that, though, he has completely lost his fat, pudgy, big boned, marshmellow appearance, becoming very long legged, lean and dainty looking, with a fantastic natural stance, his flat headed border collie puppy face which used to make me call him "so ugly he's cute", is transforming into a more high domed head with the deeper stop that Paps are supposed to have, and his coat and feathers are coming in longer and lusher every day.
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| Pepper (left), Maxie (right) |
Hey, I'm blogging! Ain't that something! What I've noticed about myself of such easy-flowing words, is that some things are too deep, too confusing, to blog about. There is, like, a blockage in the brain that won't let you go there. It's a "seeing thru a glass darkly" phenomenon, "running at half mast" in sailing terms, I remember asking a club mate once about a dog of hers that had been run over several years back, and she responded "Oh, I can't talk about that." When I expressed condolences, she snapped "I WILL NOT talk about this." Some things are just too painful to process, I suspect this is when we are, or feel we are, utterly helpless to change the outcome of something that is totally unacceptable to us.
Puppy training is one thing it appears I can now wrap my mind around. I've also been making improvements to my new motor home, and getting my pop up camper ready to sell. These things are keeping me engaged, and I'll probably blog about them soon!
Upwards and onward!
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Cataract Surgery - Part 2
It's been a few months since my Cataract Surgery - Part I post, and life has gotten in the way of me completing this post, the intention of which is to inform people of what can happen instead of the perfect vision one expects. Here is my story, too long for some I'm sure, but not long enough for those considering this surgery. It ain't always what it's cracked up to be, so BEWARE!
From perfect calm going into surgery to near panic afterwards, I dared not wait for my one week appointment to see what had gone wrong. While my near vision is vastly improved (I can read without glasses with the left eye), I am seeing a shadow behind each letter, and everything at a distance looks foggy. Distant tree tops look like big green blobs. There's a haze over everything. The clinic was closed on Monday so I got in Tuesday afternoon. I was put thru a bunch of tests, and the Doc says my surgery is healing perfectly, I've got 20/20 vision in that eye, and "What are you, just a big cry baby?" I was taken aback but didn't say anything more than "No, I just don't know if what I'm experiencing is normal. Ya'll don't tell us what to expect." After the doc left the room, his nurse explained that my eye may be staying dilated longer than some people's. Everything will be fine as soon as the pupil closes back up and muscles re-trained (therapy to come) to flex the flexibile Crystaline lens I opted for (and paid $2500 extra for since insurance only covers the static lens). Apparently, my old lens was stiff so the muscles have gotten weak. It could take up to 3 months for maximal vision to be realized, the tech explained.
So I'm going into a trial this weekend, not distraught, but miffed that there are so many things the doctors don't bother to tell you beforehand. It would only take them a few minutes to allay a patient's concerns. But since they don't, I'm sharing my experience here for anyone else out there who might benefit.
The incisions nowadays are very small, because the lens comes folded over "like a taco", they said. They slip it in then flatten it, so no stitches are required. You're not allowed to bend over for about 3 days, I guess so it doesn't fall out. HA! You have to sleep with your head propped up, or on the side away from the surgical eye for a few days, too, so it doesn't dislodge. HA! HA! Can you just see yourself waking up on the wrong side and your lens is lying on your pillow! OOPS!
Oh, I could say more. Like, a lens is nothing more than a thing. A replacable thing. They make an incision in the lens pouch, suck out the old one like, they tell me, "sucking a grape out of its skin", insert the new. The lens insurance pays for are inflexible lens, set for either close up or distance, your choice. You still need glasses for one or the other. The Crystaline Lens is flexible but not covered by insurance, though they aren't much more expensive. Go figure.
Then there are what they call the "hinges". "The muscles of the eye have to re-attach to the hinges", they say, "then the muscles have to learn to bend and contract the lens according to what you are focusing on". All the years of going blind, the muscles have weakened. They require rehab. They don't tell you that ahead of time!
Then there are the eye drops. An antibiotic, 1 drop 4 times a day. An anti-inflamatory, 1 drop 2 times a day. Both of these begin 3 days before surgery, both sting, and my insurance co-pay was $120. After surgery, another anti-inflamatory is added, 4 times a day, for . . . . . they didn't say how long. I'm still dropping them in. Guess that's right.
For those considering this surgery, here are even more details:
The surgery is painless. The first round of drops sting a bit for a few seconds; there's a stick when they put in the IV drip in your hand, and you have to fast from midnight to the following morning after surgery, but that's all. Recovery takes only a few days before you're good to run and play, however it takes up to 3 months and several checkups, and maybe a lasic correction, before you're done. They don't tell you that until afterwards.
Starting from scratch, you have to get an eye exam to see if you qualify, and if so, you must schedule the surgery within 3 months. Then, you have to get a signed permission from your Family Doctor attesting to the Eye Surgery Center that you are in good enough health. Since I have no family doctor, I had to get a physical! Fortunately, I've been in process of getting thoroughly checked out as I turn 65, with an assigned doctor sending me here and there for lab tests, and explaining the results to me. She signed the form.
You have to decide whether to have the standard lens put in (that insurance covers), or the Crystalin lens, which costs $2650 per eye, out of pocket. In any case, you have to begin a regimen of eye drops 4 times a day for 3 days prior to the surgery -- one an anti-inflammatory, the other an antibiotoc. Even with insurance, these drops cost $125! OUCH! And doing anything 4 times a day, on schedule, without fail, is a strain. Thank god for my I-phone's wonderful alarm system.
You are required to have someone come with you to drive you home. They have to stay in the waiting room the whole time -- can't leave. No problem, as John was with me and brought his book. With surgery scheduled for 7 a.m., you are told to fast after midnight. I was told I could have black coffee, water, or unsweetened tea over at the eye center a few weeks earlier, so I made myself up a big cup and walked into the surgery center with it. They asked me if I had been drinking it, I said yes, and they had a fit, saying "Who told you that?", I was NOT allowed coffee or anything but water. I would have to reschedule, or I could wait until 9 a.m. and could NOT leave the waiting room in the meantime.
I had received a letter in the mail a few days prior to surgery saying they were going "paperless in compliance with new laws" and would I please go online and fill out my forms there. I did that, then saw no need to bring my folder of papers along, then they couldn't pull up my online papers and I had to fill them all out by hand anyway. Good thing the surgery was pushed back!
It all worked out. About 8 they began putting drops in my eyes to dilate my pupils, and moved me and John into a dark TV room, where we sat back in recliners and watched an I Love Lucy DVD. Every so often someone would come in and add more drops to my left eye. I've never found Lucille Ball funny, just loud, obnoxious and silly, but there must have been a sedative in those drops or I was more nervous than I thought, because I found both her and Desi hilarious! I was sorry they came to get us at 9.
John stayed behind. They laid me on a gurney, fully clothed, shoes on, with a hair net over my head and footies over my shoes. The anesthesialogist stuck an IV in my hand, nurses added more drops to my eye, I told jokes, and we all chatted and laughed for about 15 minutes, It felt like a party. Then the anesthesialogist said he was beginning the drip but I'd remain awake and aware, they wheeled me what seemed like a few yards out of the room into another one. When I got in there I asked "How long before the surgery", and they said it was all over! HUH! I don't remember a thing.
They sent me home with dark sunglasses for outside, an eye patch to wear at night, and instructions not to bend over or lift anything heavy for 48 hours, not to cook, to sleep on my back, and keep up with my eyedrops as before, plus a new one, for a week. No computer work for 24 hours.
I was to come in the next morning for a checkup, which I passed. That's when they explained that it could take up to 3 months for complete healing to take place and I might need to schedule a lasic correction at some point. I passed the test with flying colors, though. All seems perfect at the moment.
There was some sensation of gravel in my eye the first few days. Also a sense of eye strain. My eyelid wanted to stay shut the first day so I let it. It was like looking thru vaseline, with a violet haze. The next day the world looked blue instead of the yellow tint I'm used to. Like those new blue headlights I despise, or those white light lightbulbs that make everything, including people, look garrish. My depth perception is a bit off. I reach for something but it's still half an inch away.
So, here I am 2 months later and the left eye has made NO IMPROVEMENT. I am extremely sad, disappointed, and angry. I had scheduled the second eye for 3 weeks after the first, but I cancelled that until the left eye started feeling like my own. It still doesn't. While I'm not in any sort of pain, after 11 days I am still a tad disoriented and have slight headaches behind both eyes. My reading glasses don't work any more. The left eye doesn't need them, the right eye can't see without them. So I read with one eye shut depending on which one is tired. For distance, I use mostly the right eye. The new eye has horrible distance vision.
Just for the hell of it, I Googled "cataract surgery"+Alternatives, and the first page that popped up said "Cataract Surgery Obsolete" and goes on to describe what cataracts actually are, how they form, and drops that dissolve them within 6 months. That made me feel like crap. So shitty, in fact, I can't finish this post. I feel like a fool for not checking out alternatives to begin with. Me, the gal who has preached "alternative medicine" for years. What a fool I am.
Sorry, I can't write any more on this topic right now. I'll try later when my thoughts aren't so scattered and I'm not so upset. . . . . . . . . see Cataract Surgery - Part 3, finally written in March 2013.
From perfect calm going into surgery to near panic afterwards, I dared not wait for my one week appointment to see what had gone wrong. While my near vision is vastly improved (I can read without glasses with the left eye), I am seeing a shadow behind each letter, and everything at a distance looks foggy. Distant tree tops look like big green blobs. There's a haze over everything. The clinic was closed on Monday so I got in Tuesday afternoon. I was put thru a bunch of tests, and the Doc says my surgery is healing perfectly, I've got 20/20 vision in that eye, and "What are you, just a big cry baby?" I was taken aback but didn't say anything more than "No, I just don't know if what I'm experiencing is normal. Ya'll don't tell us what to expect." After the doc left the room, his nurse explained that my eye may be staying dilated longer than some people's. Everything will be fine as soon as the pupil closes back up and muscles re-trained (therapy to come) to flex the flexibile Crystaline lens I opted for (and paid $2500 extra for since insurance only covers the static lens). Apparently, my old lens was stiff so the muscles have gotten weak. It could take up to 3 months for maximal vision to be realized, the tech explained.
So I'm going into a trial this weekend, not distraught, but miffed that there are so many things the doctors don't bother to tell you beforehand. It would only take them a few minutes to allay a patient's concerns. But since they don't, I'm sharing my experience here for anyone else out there who might benefit.
The incisions nowadays are very small, because the lens comes folded over "like a taco", they said. They slip it in then flatten it, so no stitches are required. You're not allowed to bend over for about 3 days, I guess so it doesn't fall out. HA! You have to sleep with your head propped up, or on the side away from the surgical eye for a few days, too, so it doesn't dislodge. HA! HA! Can you just see yourself waking up on the wrong side and your lens is lying on your pillow! OOPS!
Oh, I could say more. Like, a lens is nothing more than a thing. A replacable thing. They make an incision in the lens pouch, suck out the old one like, they tell me, "sucking a grape out of its skin", insert the new. The lens insurance pays for are inflexible lens, set for either close up or distance, your choice. You still need glasses for one or the other. The Crystaline Lens is flexible but not covered by insurance, though they aren't much more expensive. Go figure.
Then there are what they call the "hinges". "The muscles of the eye have to re-attach to the hinges", they say, "then the muscles have to learn to bend and contract the lens according to what you are focusing on". All the years of going blind, the muscles have weakened. They require rehab. They don't tell you that ahead of time!
Then there are the eye drops. An antibiotic, 1 drop 4 times a day. An anti-inflamatory, 1 drop 2 times a day. Both of these begin 3 days before surgery, both sting, and my insurance co-pay was $120. After surgery, another anti-inflamatory is added, 4 times a day, for . . . . . they didn't say how long. I'm still dropping them in. Guess that's right.
For those considering this surgery, here are even more details:
The surgery is painless. The first round of drops sting a bit for a few seconds; there's a stick when they put in the IV drip in your hand, and you have to fast from midnight to the following morning after surgery, but that's all. Recovery takes only a few days before you're good to run and play, however it takes up to 3 months and several checkups, and maybe a lasic correction, before you're done. They don't tell you that until afterwards.
Starting from scratch, you have to get an eye exam to see if you qualify, and if so, you must schedule the surgery within 3 months. Then, you have to get a signed permission from your Family Doctor attesting to the Eye Surgery Center that you are in good enough health. Since I have no family doctor, I had to get a physical! Fortunately, I've been in process of getting thoroughly checked out as I turn 65, with an assigned doctor sending me here and there for lab tests, and explaining the results to me. She signed the form.
You have to decide whether to have the standard lens put in (that insurance covers), or the Crystalin lens, which costs $2650 per eye, out of pocket. In any case, you have to begin a regimen of eye drops 4 times a day for 3 days prior to the surgery -- one an anti-inflammatory, the other an antibiotoc. Even with insurance, these drops cost $125! OUCH! And doing anything 4 times a day, on schedule, without fail, is a strain. Thank god for my I-phone's wonderful alarm system.
You are required to have someone come with you to drive you home. They have to stay in the waiting room the whole time -- can't leave. No problem, as John was with me and brought his book. With surgery scheduled for 7 a.m., you are told to fast after midnight. I was told I could have black coffee, water, or unsweetened tea over at the eye center a few weeks earlier, so I made myself up a big cup and walked into the surgery center with it. They asked me if I had been drinking it, I said yes, and they had a fit, saying "Who told you that?", I was NOT allowed coffee or anything but water. I would have to reschedule, or I could wait until 9 a.m. and could NOT leave the waiting room in the meantime.
I had received a letter in the mail a few days prior to surgery saying they were going "paperless in compliance with new laws" and would I please go online and fill out my forms there. I did that, then saw no need to bring my folder of papers along, then they couldn't pull up my online papers and I had to fill them all out by hand anyway. Good thing the surgery was pushed back!
It all worked out. About 8 they began putting drops in my eyes to dilate my pupils, and moved me and John into a dark TV room, where we sat back in recliners and watched an I Love Lucy DVD. Every so often someone would come in and add more drops to my left eye. I've never found Lucille Ball funny, just loud, obnoxious and silly, but there must have been a sedative in those drops or I was more nervous than I thought, because I found both her and Desi hilarious! I was sorry they came to get us at 9.
John stayed behind. They laid me on a gurney, fully clothed, shoes on, with a hair net over my head and footies over my shoes. The anesthesialogist stuck an IV in my hand, nurses added more drops to my eye, I told jokes, and we all chatted and laughed for about 15 minutes, It felt like a party. Then the anesthesialogist said he was beginning the drip but I'd remain awake and aware, they wheeled me what seemed like a few yards out of the room into another one. When I got in there I asked "How long before the surgery", and they said it was all over! HUH! I don't remember a thing.
They sent me home with dark sunglasses for outside, an eye patch to wear at night, and instructions not to bend over or lift anything heavy for 48 hours, not to cook, to sleep on my back, and keep up with my eyedrops as before, plus a new one, for a week. No computer work for 24 hours.
I was to come in the next morning for a checkup, which I passed. That's when they explained that it could take up to 3 months for complete healing to take place and I might need to schedule a lasic correction at some point. I passed the test with flying colors, though. All seems perfect at the moment.
There was some sensation of gravel in my eye the first few days. Also a sense of eye strain. My eyelid wanted to stay shut the first day so I let it. It was like looking thru vaseline, with a violet haze. The next day the world looked blue instead of the yellow tint I'm used to. Like those new blue headlights I despise, or those white light lightbulbs that make everything, including people, look garrish. My depth perception is a bit off. I reach for something but it's still half an inch away.
So, here I am 2 months later and the left eye has made NO IMPROVEMENT. I am extremely sad, disappointed, and angry. I had scheduled the second eye for 3 weeks after the first, but I cancelled that until the left eye started feeling like my own. It still doesn't. While I'm not in any sort of pain, after 11 days I am still a tad disoriented and have slight headaches behind both eyes. My reading glasses don't work any more. The left eye doesn't need them, the right eye can't see without them. So I read with one eye shut depending on which one is tired. For distance, I use mostly the right eye. The new eye has horrible distance vision.
Just for the hell of it, I Googled "cataract surgery"+Alternatives, and the first page that popped up said "Cataract Surgery Obsolete" and goes on to describe what cataracts actually are, how they form, and drops that dissolve them within 6 months. That made me feel like crap. So shitty, in fact, I can't finish this post. I feel like a fool for not checking out alternatives to begin with. Me, the gal who has preached "alternative medicine" for years. What a fool I am.
Sorry, I can't write any more on this topic right now. I'll try later when my thoughts aren't so scattered and I'm not so upset. . . . . . . . . see Cataract Surgery - Part 3, finally written in March 2013.
Friday, May 4, 2012
Components Training
Going through a rough patch these past 2 months, I haven't been blogging much. Then Susan Garrett's Components Training blog post came along, and suddenly I feel I have a better handle on how to get through all of this. Agility Training is like that. It offers many lessons that can be applied to life. Here's a short synopsis of what's going on with me:
Then yesterday I read a blurb on Susan Garret's blog about Components Training, breaking it up into little tiny pieces and just doing one step at a time to get the desired result. Not trying to teach nor expect the final behavior all at once. Back chaining as necessary to build a solid foundation. Just as I've done teaching Montessori pre-schoolers throughout my professional career. Break complicated skills down into tiny components, then put them together, and ordinary kids perform what seem like extraordinary feats. Everyone is gifted with the right training.
The article gave me just the advice I needed to tackle this mountain of details facing me. Start somewhere, doing one little thing at a time, whittling down the pile bit by bit. Of course I already know all that, but the reminder came in at the right moment, and suddenly I don't feel so overwhelmed. I must feel better. Looky here, I'm blogging!
I have Tanya Lee's agility seminar to blog about, what I learned recently about how to tug properly, my new RV, my puppy's progress, and my cataract surgery. The little post I put up earlier entitled 'CATARACT SURGERY - Part I' received more hits than most others I've posted, so this must be a very hot search topic. I promise to give it it's due, when I get time. It will keep. I have to prioritize. Baby steps. Baby steps. Baby steps WILL get me back on top of the pile eventually.
As well as, always, the 3 P's:
If not upwards and onward for the moment, at least maybe I'll not be going downward and backwards.
- My cataract surgery did not go well last month and I'm dealing with vertigo, fear and disappointment. I had such high hopes to get improved vision, but it is worse. I feel sad deep down inside, always on the verge of tears, like our disabled veterans must feel.
- My right hip started hurting last month and I'm having trouble running and going up stairs. Anti-inflammatories and ice packs have done nothing to heal it. What's up with this? I need to see a doctor but don't have the time.
- My Dad died yesterday after a long painful illness. I spent a week with my Mother at his bedside in Florida, watching him grow weaker and saying goodbye, and that was sad.
- His funeral arrangements, and moving my Mom into an assisted living situation closer to home, are all up in the air, especially with the long distances we live apart. She's very independent, too, so is making all the decisions, but my activities are on hold until all this is settled.
- With me out of town for a whole week, the yard and house have gone to the dogs, and I'm not at all ready to receive the company that's coming in for Dad's funeral.
- I came home to learn that my husband's young son in law was killed in a car crash while I was in Florida tending to Dad, leaving behind a widow and 7 young children. Inconceivably sad, far sadder than what I'm going through.
- My new RV needs some minor work before I take it to a trial, and I don't have time for that with all the other stuff going on.
- My new puppy needs training and I have neither time nor concentration for that.
- I brought home some mangos from Florida, and along with them came fruit flies, which are now all over my kitchen. The fly catcher strips I've hung up are no where near as desirable to these pests as a banana peel, so I interwove one of those into the strip last night. This morning there were 100 or more flies on the strip! One small victory! But at least 500 more flies are still on the loose.
- The stinging caterpillars all last month have my dogs so afraid to go outside, they are peeing and pooping in the house. They've been stung several times, and despite my diligent efforts to clean up after them, the house is getting "that odor". With company coming for the funeral, that makes me frantic.
- My grieving mother has been on an emotional roller coaster regarding my Dad's illness and now his death, making us all fear for her health as well.
Then yesterday I read a blurb on Susan Garret's blog about Components Training, breaking it up into little tiny pieces and just doing one step at a time to get the desired result. Not trying to teach nor expect the final behavior all at once. Back chaining as necessary to build a solid foundation. Just as I've done teaching Montessori pre-schoolers throughout my professional career. Break complicated skills down into tiny components, then put them together, and ordinary kids perform what seem like extraordinary feats. Everyone is gifted with the right training.
The article gave me just the advice I needed to tackle this mountain of details facing me. Start somewhere, doing one little thing at a time, whittling down the pile bit by bit. Of course I already know all that, but the reminder came in at the right moment, and suddenly I don't feel so overwhelmed. I must feel better. Looky here, I'm blogging!
I have Tanya Lee's agility seminar to blog about, what I learned recently about how to tug properly, my new RV, my puppy's progress, and my cataract surgery. The little post I put up earlier entitled 'CATARACT SURGERY - Part I' received more hits than most others I've posted, so this must be a very hot search topic. I promise to give it it's due, when I get time. It will keep. I have to prioritize. Baby steps. Baby steps. Baby steps WILL get me back on top of the pile eventually.
As well as, always, the 3 P's:
- Patience,
- Persistence, and
- Prayer
If not upwards and onward for the moment, at least maybe I'll not be going downward and backwards.
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